Buzzing by Samuel Sattin

 

I'm always impressed by the variety of representation in YA and kid's books now, for both queer and neurodivergent kids. I picked this one up in part because of the appealing art, but it also turned out to be a wonderful depiction of young teens dealing with mental health and queerness.

Isaac is struggling, in school and in life. He is constantly plagued by a swarm of invasive thoughts that buzz in his head like angry bees (a very effective visual depiction). He is never without them- not when he's trying to pay attention in class, not when he's drawing (and he's very good at drawing), and not even at bedtime as he tries to fall asleep.

He lives with his mother and big sister, and he doesn't have many friends, but he does have a diagnosis of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. He does his homework, sees his therapist, and just tries to get through each day while the negative thoughts buzz, buzz buzz.

Then a classmate, Micah, invites Isaac to come play in their Swamps & Sorcery game (Look, D&D has an expensive copyright okay?). Turns out it's not just Micah, but a whole group of kids. They think Isaac's art is amazing. They think Isaac is amazing, and when he's submerged in the fantasy of the game, his invasive thoughts are a lot quieter. Suddenly he has friends, and he's trying new things, and everything is a little easier. Also Micah maybe really likes him, and Isaac likes them too.

But when Isaac gets a D on a test, he hides it- only for his sister to spot it and tell their mom. His mother decides the game and his new friends are a distraction. The therapist has warned that fantasy can be dangerous for obsessive thoughts, but different things work for different people and Isaac has found it to be helpful. Now cut off from both his new interests and his friends, the buzzing of negative thoughts returns full force. On top of that, he's convinced his sister hates him.

Isaac has to prove that he can both keep up his grades and that his new friends and their game are a help, not a hindrance. He may get help from an unexpected side.

I really loved the realism in the family interactions here, there's no black and white, no good or bad guys, and no cure for OCD. A lot of people have what's best for Isaac in mind but the conflict comes from the difference in their ideas of what that is. There's no easy answers here, just the real life struggle of working out what makes life a little better.

Books Read 2023

 

It's been a long year, with some serious ups and downs. In October, I finally got top surgery! Zero regrets, apart from wishing it could've happened sooner. I feel so much better with a load off my chest! 

I've come a very long way from where I was when I started this blog, jobless, unhappy in my body, and just generally not in a great place mentally. I was looking for something better, and my life has reached a much better place since.

We spent the last few months babying my cat Maxie though, as she slowly succumbed to cancer. We had a lot of debates about when and how to let her go, as she gradually went downhill and her ear tips curled from prednisone, but she was still enthusiastically eating and even had some of our chicken the night before she passed away quietly in her sleep, sparing us the decision.

I still miss her, and 13 years does not seem like long enough. 

But I did read, through the year, and here's the final list. Maintaining my streak of beating 100 books per year.

Merrow - Amanda Braxton-Smith

Detransition, Baby - Torrey Peters

Pumpkin Heads (GN) - Rainbow Rowell & Faith Erin Hicks

What if We Were... (GN) - Axelle Lenoir

The Witch Boy (GN) - Molly Knox Ostertag

Ratscalibur - Josh Lieb

Castle Waiting Volumes I & II (GN) - Linda Medley

The Ringmaster's Wife - Kristy Cambron

The Great & Only Barnum - Candace Fleming

Orphans of the Carnival - Carol Birch

Haunting at Bonaventure Circus - Jaime Jo Wright

The Dogtrot Murder - Nick Sanders

Swords: An Artist's Devotion (picture book) - Ben Boos

The Wonders - John Woolf

TAZ: Eleventh Hour (GN) - The McElroys

The Church of Marvels - Leslie Parry

Self-Made Man - Norah Vincent

The One and Only Ivan - Katherine Applegate

A Wizard of Earthsea - Ursula K. LeGuin

Something Wicked This Way Comes - Ray Bradbury

The Girl from the Sea (GN) - Molly Knox Ostertag

Snapdragon (GN) - Kat Leyh

Backwoods Witchcraft - Jake Richards

Becoming a Man - P. Carl

Fangs (GN) - Sarah Anderson

The Dreaming I: Pathways & Emanations - Simon Spurrier

Tuck Everlasting - Natalie Babbit

The Hidden Witch (GN) - Molly Knox Ostertag

The Tombs of Atuan - Ursula K. LeGuin

The Farthest Shore - Ursula K. LeGuin

Garbage Night (GN) - Jen Lee

Blackwater (GN) - Jeanette Arroyo & Ren Graham

City of Villains - Estelle Laure

Cottons: The Secret of the Wind (GN) - Jim Pascoe

As the Crow Flies (GN) - Melanie Gillman

Dewey's Nine Lives - Vicki Myron

The Witch's Vacuum Cleaner - Terry Pratchett

Grandma Gatewood's Walk - Ben Montgomery

Archival Quality (GN) - Ivy Noelle Weir & Steenz

Pumpkin - Julie Murphy

Dumplin - Julie Murphy

Howl's Moving Castle - Dianna Wynne Jones

Squire & Knight (GN) - Scott Chantler

House of Many Ways - Dianna Wynne Jones

Labyrinth Bestiary - S.T. Bende

Anya's Ghost (GN) - Vera Brosgol

Castle in the Air - Dianna Wynne Jones

Camp Whatever (GN) - Chris Grine

Ghostlight - Kenneth Oppel

Neverlanders (GN) - Tom Taylor & Jon Sommariva

Lumberjanes V1-4 (GN) - N. Stevenson & S. Watters

The Doors to Nowhere (GN) - Chris Grine

Lumberjanes V5-6 (GN) - N. Stevenson & S. Watters

Malamander - Thomas Taylor

Lumberjanes V7-8 (GN) - N. Stevenson & S. Watters

The Blue Salt Road - Joanne Harris

Wait 'til Helen Comes (GN) - Mary D. Hahn & Scott Peterson

Pearl of the Sea (GN) - Anthony Silverston &

Mistress of the Storm - M. L. Welsh

The Castle in the Attic - Elizabeth Winthrop

Hamster Princess #1 - Ursula Vernon

Long Lost - Jacqueline West

Lumberjanes V 9-11 (GN) - N. Stevenson & S. Watters

The Wainscott Weasel - Tor Seidler

Tin - Padraig Kenny

Lumberjanes V12-14 (GN) - N. Stevenson & S. Watters

Lighthouse Family 1: The Storm - Cynthia Rylant

Jed and the Junkyard War - Steven Bohls

The Magnificent Monsters of Cedar Street - Lauren Oliver

Sea Serpent's Heir #1 (GN) - Mairghread Scott & Pablo Tunica

Revenge of the Librarians (Cartoons) - Tom Gould

The Skull - Jon Klassen

Troll Mill - Katherine Langrish

The Bellwoods Game - Celia Krampien

Things in the Basement (GN) - Ben Hatke

The Girl from the Other Side #1-11 (GN) - Nagabe

Seven Wild Sisters - Charles de Lint

From Here to Eternity - Caitlin Doughty

Saint Juniper's Folly - Alex Crespo

White Smoke - Tiffany Jackson

Greymist Fair - Francesca Zappia

All Out - Various Editor Saundra Mitchell

Hollow (GN) - Shannon Watters, B. Boyer-White, & B. Nelle

Over the Garden Wall: Distillatoria (GN) - Jonathan Case

The Unlikely Ones - Mary Brown

Thornhedge - T. Kingfisher

Labyrinth - A.C. Smith

Twig (GN) - Skottie Young & Kyle Strahm

Every Heart a Doorway - Seanan McGuire

Favorite Medieval Tales - Mary Pope Osborne

Middlegame - Seanan McGuire